Working Out the Terms of your Spousal Support Agreement in a Collaborative Divorce

Spousal support, also known as alimony, is an issue that arises in many Florida divorces. It is the money one partner pays to the other after their divorce, generally for a fixed period of time but sometimes, until the receiving spouse remarries or either partner dies. This money is intended to help the spouse who opted out of the full-time workforce to care for the couple’s home and children during the marriage to avoid financial hardship.

 In a collaborative divorce, the divorcing couple works together to make their own determinations about their divorce settlement, rather than having the court make them. Alimony is often an issue discussed during collaborative divorces alongside parenting time and the division of the couple’s marital assets.

In Florida, you Can Waive your Right to Seek Spousal Support

Florida law permits individuals to waive their right to seek alimony in the event of their divorces in prenuptial agreements. This is not the case in all states.

 Just like a collaborative divorce, a prenuptial agreement requires a couple to be flexible and willing to work together to make determinations that benefit them both, even in unpleasant situations like divorce.

 Waiving Spousal Support in Exchange for a Larger Share of Marital Assets

 When you divorce through collaboration, rather than litigation, you and your spouse work together to reach a divorce agreement that best fits your needs. In any divorce, dividing your marital assets is a component of the final settlement and often, it is the largest component of the settlement. Talk about potentially opting out of alimony in exchange for a more favorable share of your marital assets with your spouse, but also with your lawyer privately – there could be issues you do not initially recognize, like large tax burdens associated with certain marital assets or the long-term impact of choosing not to create an alimony order.

Collaborative Divorce is All About Keeping Control of your Divorce

Couples who choose collaborative divorce are often more satisfied with the results of their divorces than couples who divorce through litigation.

If you took on lower-paying jobs or opted out of the workforce completely during your marriage, alimony is a way to protect your financial future. Do not confuse the need to be amicable in a collaborative divorce with a need to agree with everything your spouse suggests. If you feel alimony is in your best interest, explain this and support your position with relevant facts during your collaborative divorce meetings. Your lawyer is your advocate, but you also need to advocate for yourself.

Work with an Experienced Winter Park Divorce Lawyer

When you are considering divorce, you have a lot on your mind. Before you begin the collaborative divorce process, discuss these issues with your divorce lawyer so you begin the process educated about Florida’s divorce laws and what you can expect given your case’s unique circumstances. Contact The Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C. today to schedule your initial consultation with us.

http://www.leg.state.fl.us/Statutes/index.cfm?App_mode=Display_Statute&URL=0000-0099/0061/Sections/0061.079.html

 

Collaborative Law 2015

The Collaborative Family Law Conference is meeting at the Wyndham Grand Hotel at the Bonnet Creek Resort this weekend. BOY do I FEEL LUCKY!!!

Working with Collaborative leaders from all over the state to perfect our practice is a great way to finish out my 3 year term for Continuing Legal Education. Some people would say, wait, why didn't you already finish that? Well, I did, but this is a bonus!

When 400 professionals get together in a legal seminar, it can be a great experience, and it can be a bit of a tooth pulling session.
As the Keynote speaker noted, "How often do you get a chance to be in a group making changes in the world."
Every family needs to know what Collaborative Law can do for their relationships and getting past divorce to a new life.
In Florida there are 10 different Practice Groups. All are part of the Collaborative Law Council of Florida.

I am member of Collaborative Family Law of Central Florida. www.cfl-cfl.com
Being "intentional" in the way a family goes about breaking apart can save children from the dramatic impact of divorce. Most parents say they just want to take care of the kids, but how they do that is a litigated case is beyond me. Most parents think fighting for the most time possible or the most child support possible is what they see as "taking care of the children."

In a Collaborative Divorce, we seek to assist the parents in communicating effectively so they can AGREE on various Goals and then agree to processes to achieve those shared goals.
Shared goals may be for the children to be able to attend college without racking up significant student loan debt.

Awareness of Collaborative Practice
Awareness of the Collaborative Attorney
Relationship Respect - how your name comes up
Reputation - not just what you do, but how you do it.
Visibility - You must be able to BE Found by clients.

Define your brand - Non Adversarial
Live your brand - Non Adversarial
Communicate your brand - Non Adversarial

What is my Brand? WT's Farm - The Ducker Brand

My Grandfather Ducker was well known on Signal Mountain as the most Honest man around. If you asked him a question, no matter how difficult the answer, he would answer honestly, sometimes to his own harm. He grew up in poverty and worked his entire life to give his children the best he could. He was a wonderful example of living up to your word in my life.

My other Grandfather, WT, was the hardest working man I know. He worked from absolute poverty to being one of the leading Polled Hereford farmers in Southeast Tennessee. At a time when artisan was not associated with food, he was a farmer who worked tirelessly for the very best beef, Polled Hereford, being fed the very best grain. All from WT's Farm. His Brand was recognizable on the Mountain and in the County and in the State and across the Southeast.

Who YOU SAY your are must align with who OTHERS SAY you are and most importantly for your own mental health, must be WHO YOU ARE. When I say, "I want to help you move from here to there with the least conflict possible to keep your children from being negatively impacted by your decisions." I am saying that after 15 years of experience watching families break apart and seeing them invest large sums of money to 'get what's right', there is a better way.

Collaborative Divorce is a better way.

I am a calming counsel seeking best outcomes for my clients and their families.

My Brand is a reason to choose. My Brand differentiates me from the other lawyers, attorneys, mediators, counselors, sharks and fish in the sea?

Not just a logo or a tagline.

If you truly want to protect your family from the necessary conflict of a separation, seek out a Collaborative Professional to assist you and your spouse in making the best decisions for the sake of your family.

A Divorce may involve Alimony, Child Support, Timesharing or Property Division. But those are merely the words that are used to describe the outcome. Some divorces involve significant assets, allegations of hiding assets, worries about disclosure of information or finding where all the money was hidden.

Some attorneys will do exactly what their clients want. I am not one of those attorneys. I will work hard to help your family get over this bump in the road and move on with your new life. Call me to find out how Collaborative Law can help your family.
Aubrey

In Defense of Marriage and other Divorce Topics

We have Attorney General Pam Bondi defending "traditional" marriage in Florida. George Sheldon is trying to unseat her in the election November 4th.  In China, mobs are defending marriage. http://www.opposingviews.com/i/society/crime/mob-led-scorned-wife-strips-husbands-mistress-naked-streets-beats-her

So you really did not marry the "Love of your life." Or maybe you did but He or She CHANGED! That is so unfair. Perhaps the Love of your Life was really infatuation and it took 17 years to figure out you were not really that taken by their longterm life goals. Today must be Huffington Post day, because every article I read pointed to or derived from an article amalgamated by Ariana Huffington.

The first one is actually called, "I Didn't Marry the Love of My Life." http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/04/marrying-for-love_n_5642062.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular


Another Divorce related Huffington Post article deals with the role of Parenting Coordinators. When parents cannot seem to agree on any issue, many courts will appoint a Parenting Coordinator to facilitate communication for the benefit of the children.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/nicole-h-sodoma/parenting-coordinators-child-custody_b_5287604.html

Of course, after a Collaborative Divorce, many clients report their communications with their former spouse have never been so good.

Then there are the dreaded 6 Words No Divorced Parent Wants to Hear. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/08/03/parenting-after-divorce_n_5632205.html?utm_hp_ref=mostpopular
You may have guessed: Mom/Dad, I want to live with Dad/Mom. (I know its 7, but the title of the story is not mine to change.)

Along with many guidelines for parents to follow so their children will never utter those horrible words! Do not "badmouth" the other parent. Cover your legal bases. Remain active in your child's life. Recognize the value of the other parent. Yes, good ideas if only clients will follow them.

Forbes Wants You to Have a Dog

An electronic article in Forbes Magazine Online raised my concern: http://www.forbes.com/sites/jefflanders/2014/04/17/how-are-pets-handled-in-divorce/

Thankfully, Forbes is encouraging its readers to think long-term and consider the business of divorce rather than the emotional fighting that sometimes occurs. Of course, the article details the numerous courts and litigants who want the Judge to decide who gets fluffy and who gets visitation with Fido.

Too many decisions are left to the Judge when there are ways for people to make their own decisions, with help of counsel of course! Collaborative Divorce or Conscious Uncoupling is a Great Place to Start. Visit http://www.collaborativepractice.com/ to learn how this might be right for your family.

There are even websites tailored to Men and Women considering divorce such as: www.Divorceformen.us and www.dadsdivorce.com or http://www.womansdivorce.com/ and http://divorcesupport.about.com/od/divorceadvicepolls/a/adviceforwomen.htm

My favorite magazine, The WEEK ran an article for Men getting a divorce titled: 8 financial tips for men getting a divorce.  http://theweek.com/article/index/250324/8-financial-tips-for-men-getting-a-divorce

Suggestions include: Don't be afraid to pay Alimony. Don't be Afraid to Ask for Alimony! If you haven't read The WEEK, this article is a great example of why you should be reading The WEEK every week.

Some websites target women by featuring books that imply divorce should be a hard fought battle. One book, Divorce: Think Financially, Not Emotionally® – What Women Need to Know About Securing Their Financial Future Before, During and After Divorce, by Jeff Landers, even promises you will learn how to:

Avoid the top mistakes divorcing women make

Shore up your financial position so you enter the divorce process prepared

Choose between regular alimony or an up-front, lump-sum alimony payment

Decide whether to keep your marital house – and how to do so if it makes sense, financially

Protect your business, intellectual property and personal assets

Divide your assets in a way most favorable to you, from a tax and financial point of view

Disinherit your husband

Determine whether your husband is hiding assets

Build a qualified divorce team

You can even download and preview a chapter at http://thinkfinancially.com/book/!

By using language like "Devastating Mistakes" and "Where Husbands typically hide assets" this guy just wants to scare you into buying his book.

There is a better way!!!

Men and Women benefit from Collaborative Divorce. More importantly Children and Families benefit from "Conscious Uncoupling" as Collaborative Divorce is now being described.

Last Day of July

Wow, I was trying to post a note yesterday, but since I started with a draft from June, it posted in June. I really wanted to post something in July. I have been very busy.

Of course today I discovered that my phone lines have not been working as expected and many of my incoming phone calls have reached a "The Line is Disconnected. If you believe you have reached this recording in error, please hang up and try your call again."

While I am listed on Martindale-Hubbell as an AV Preeminent Attorney, they have my phone number disconnected in their system. I wish it were a temporary problem, but apparently it has been this way for a few weeks.

WHAT??? I have been busy AND new clients have not been able to reach me from my telephone listings! That hurts.

Just to let you know, I can always be found at www.aubreylaw.com
You can email me at aubreylaw@gmail.com
You can call my office direct at 407-645-3297 or 407-645-1330.

Please let me know if you ever call my office and cannot get through. I have a phone system that is supposed to roll calls to an empty line (we have several) or take a message if all lines are busy.

Please forgive me if you have been trying to get through and have reached an error message. I am trying to get it corrected ASAP! They said "24-48 hours" but I am really hoping for 2-4 hours.

I like efficiency in services!!!