Ok, how about a 5th? Not working with an Experienced Collaborative Attorney
Work with an Experienced Winter Park
Collaborative Divorce Lawyer
Monday, October 9, 2017
Four Mistakes to Avoid with your Collaborative Divorce
Choosing
a collaborative divorce over ending your marriage in the courtroom can save you time, money,
and stress. Simply making the choice to divorce this way is not a guarantee
that the divorce will be easy, though. You can make mistakes during your
collaborative divorce that set the process back, cost you money, and can make
it impossible to complete the process. Understanding these mistakes before you
begin the divorce process is the key to avoiding them.
Number 1: Refusing to Compromise with your Spouse
A
collaborative divorce only works when you are willing to compromise with your
spouse. Before your first collaborative divorce meeting, sit with your lawyer
and make a list of your priorities for the divorce, ranked from highest to
lowest. Brainstorm the compromises you are willing to make and those on which
you stand firm. If you are not willing to budge at all, you will not be able to
reach a mutually satisfying settlement.
#2: Being So Willing to Compromise that you
Do Not Advocate for Yourself
The
opposite of refusing to budge on your priorities is being so willing to
acquiesce to your spouse that you come away from the divorce with nothing you
wanted. Remember, this is your divorce too. These are your marital assets, your
children, and your future. Be willing to advocate for yourself and know when to
put your foot down.
3: Not Taking Care to Anticipate and Manage
Disagreements
You
should know where you and your spouse stand on issues like alimony and
parenting time before you start working on your collaborative divorce. When you
identify your priorities with your lawyer, brainstorm ways to resolve the
conflicts that you think will arise. Talk about these conflict resolution
strategies with your spouse before the meetings as well and stick to the
resolution protocol that you establish.
4. Being Unrealistic About your Divorce’s
Outcome
Your
lawyer can help you bring your expectations for the divorce in a realistic
direction. Unless your spouse is violent, suffers from a crippling addiction,
or otherwise puts your children in danger when they are together, chances are
you will not have sole custody of the children. Similarly, do not expect to
come away from the divorce with all of your marital assets simply because you
worked outside the home while your spouse worked as a homemaker. You are both
entitled to a fair share of your marital assets and the opportunity to maintain
a consistent relationship with your children. Enter the divorce process knowing
that although you will probably not get exactly what you want, you can work
with your spouse to reach a settlement that gets you pretty close.
A
collaborative divorce is a great way to complete the divorce process in an
amicable, stress-free way. If you are interested in ending your marriage
through this process instead of the traditional courtroom divorce, contact The
Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C. today to schedule your initial
consultation with an experienced collaborative
divorce lawyer in Winter Park.
Friday, October 6, 2017
Great Article on Affairs in The Atlantic
Marriages are not Immune to Affairs. Marriages today are very different. Affairs are also different. Difference is the key and the cautionary tale as follows:
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/10/why-happy-people-cheat/537882/?utm_source=fbb
https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/10/why-happy-people-cheat/537882/?utm_source=fbb
Tuesday, September 26, 2017
Should You Ask for a Paternity Test? Depends . . .
If
you are not sure about your child’s parentage, yes. There are legal reasons why
a parent would have his or her child’s paternity determined as well as personal
and medical reasons. Even if you are not looking to establish parental rights to a child, having a paternity test performed can help you
determine his or her genetic health risks and give you peace of mind.
● The right to seek custody or parenting time with
the child;
● The right to seek child support for the child; ● The right to cover the child with your health insurance and other benefits, like veteran benefits and Social Security; and
● The child’s right inherit to your assets following your death if you do not have a will.
Filing a Paternity Action in Florida
When
a party seeks to establish paternity through a court order, the court may order
a genetic paternity test and require one or both of the parents to pay for it.
In contrast, a genetic test ordered as part of an Administrative Order of
Paternity through the Department of Revenue is free. In both scenarios, the
final judgment establishes whether the alleged father is the child’s legal
father. This does not automatically grant him child support or time with the
child, but it does grant him the right to seek these things.
Wednesday, September 20, 2017
Collaborative Divorce for Unconventional Circumstances
Every marriage is unique. Logically, this means that every divorce is unique, even though they generally involve the same issues to settle, such as how the couple’s property is divided and how the couple with handle co-parenting after the divorce. There is no one-size-fits-all divorce method, and when couples try to force their divorces to fit specific molds, they often come away feeling frustrated and unsatisfied with their divorce settlement terms.
Collaborative divorce puts couples in the drivers’ seats of their divorces, rather than leaving the rulings that they will have to live with up to the court. Collaborative divorce is an especially attractive option for couples with unconventional circumstances and needs, such as business owners and those willing to try modern co-parenting arrangements like birdnesting.You Know What is Best for your Children. Develop the Ideal Co-Parenting Plan for Them
There are many different ways to handle co-parenting after a divorce. When the court makes a co-parenting determination, it does so with the child’s best interest in mind. You might determine that your child’s best interests are served by a birdnesting agreement or another alternative timesharing arrangement. If you and your spouse agree to an unconventional parenting plan like incorporating boarding school or time with extended family, work together to include this in your collaborative divorce settlement.
Some Couples Live Together After their Divorces
For some couples, the idea of living with a former spouse is laughable. For others, it is necessary and even attractive. If you are considering remaining in the same household after your divorce, even if you are in different units of a multi-family property, it is important to take this into consideration when developing the terms of your divorce settlement. Remaining in close quarters after your divorce can make it easy to deviate from your property division settlement, so it is important that you are clear and in total agreement about this settlement before starting live as a cohabitating divorced couple.
Splitting Up or Reorganizing your Business is Easier when you are In Control
If you and your spouse owned a business together, valuing the business so it can be equitably divided between you is an important part of the divorce process. But what if you both want to continue operating the business? In a case like this, your interests will still have to be divided and you will continue the business operation as partners.
Even if you do not want to continue operating the business together, you will need to find a fair way to divide it. Whether one of you plans to continue operating it will determine how you divide it and its assets.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park Divorce Attorney
Contact The Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., PLLC today to set up your initial consultation with an experienced Winter Park divorce attorney. During your consultation, you can discuss your specific divorce goals and needs with Mr. Ducker to determine an appropriate plan for ending your marriage. Never assume that your ideal divorce is unattainable – it, or something close to it, could be very doable through collaborative divorce.
Resources:
nypost.com/2016/04/28/is-birdnesting-the-stupidest-or-smartest-divorce-trend-yet/
thebalance.com/business-valuation-methods-2948478
Friday, September 15, 2017
Working Out the Terms of your Spousal Support Agreement in a Collaborative Divorce
Spousal support, also known as alimony, is an issue that arises in
many Florida divorces. It is the money one partner pays to the other after
their divorce, generally for a fixed period of time but sometimes, until the
receiving spouse remarries or either partner dies. This money is intended to
help the spouse who opted out of the full-time workforce to care for the
couple’s home and children during the marriage to avoid financial hardship.
In a collaborative divorce, the divorcing couple works together to make
their own determinations about their divorce settlement, rather than having the
court make them. Alimony is often an issue discussed during collaborative
divorces alongside parenting time and the division of the couple’s marital
assets.
Just like a collaborative divorce, a prenuptial agreement requires a couple
to be flexible and willing to work together to make determinations that benefit
them both, even in unpleasant situations like divorce.
Waiving Spousal Support in Exchange for a Larger
Share of Marital Assets
When you divorce through collaboration, rather than litigation, you and
your spouse work together to reach a divorce agreement that best fits your
needs. In any divorce, dividing your marital assets is a component of the final
settlement and often, it is the largest component of the settlement. Talk about
potentially opting out of alimony in exchange for a more favorable share of
your marital assets with your spouse, but also with your lawyer privately –
there could be issues you do not initially recognize, like large tax burdens
associated with certain marital assets or the long-term impact of choosing not
to create an alimony order.
In Florida, you Can Waive your Right to Seek
Spousal Support
Florida law permits individuals to waive their right to seek alimony in the
event of their divorces in prenuptial agreements. This is not the case in all
states.
Collaborative Divorce is All About Keeping
Control of your Divorce
Couples who choose collaborative divorce are often more satisfied with the
results of their divorces than couples who divorce through litigation.
If you took on lower-paying jobs or opted out of the workforce completely
during your marriage, alimony is a way to protect your financial future. Do not
confuse the need to be amicable in a collaborative divorce with a need to agree
with everything your spouse suggests. If you feel alimony is in your best
interest, explain this and support your position with relevant facts during
your collaborative divorce meetings. Your lawyer is your advocate, but you also
need to advocate for yourself.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park Divorce
Lawyer
When you are considering divorce, you have a lot on your mind. Before you
begin the collaborative divorce process, discuss these issues with your divorce lawyer so you begin the process educated about
Florida’s divorce laws and what you can expect given your case’s unique
circumstances. Contact The Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C.
today to schedule your initial consultation with us.
Thursday, August 24, 2017
Is Collaborative Divorce Better than Mediation?
Collaborative divorce and mediation are two forms of alternative dispute resolution (ADR)
that divorcing couples can use to complete the divorce process. One is not
inherently “better” than the other, but one can be a better fit for your
divorce. Which type of ADR is better for your divorce depends on your
relationship with your spouse and the unique details of your marriage.
Go
into the divorce process with an open mind and do your research about your
options. Work with your spouse to determine which divorce method is best for
you – if you choose collaborative divorce, you will need to work cooperatively
with him or her. You can determine if this is possible by seeing how well you
can work together to determine the right divorce method for yourselves.
How Mediation and Collaborative Divorce
are Different
Mediation
and collaborative divorce both take place outside the courtroom. With both
types of ADR, the divorcing couple maintains a high amount of control over
their divorce.
There
are differences between the two, though. The primary difference between
collaborative divorce and mediation is the absence of a mediator in a
collaborative divorce. A mediator is a neutral third party who guides the
divorcing couple toward their settlement, whereas with a collaborative divorce,
the couple handles this process with their lawyers.
Whether
collaborative divorce is better for your divorce than mediation depends largely
on your ability to work cooperatively with your spouse. Although both divorce
methods are less adversarial than a courtroom divorce, having a mediator
present can lessen any lingering tension between a couple whereas in a
collaborative divorce session, tension can leak into the couple’s interactions.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park
Divorce Lawyer
If
you are considering a collaborative divorce, work with a divorce
lawyer in Winter Park
who has specific experience facilitating this type of divorce. Contact The Law
Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., PLLC today to set up your initial
consultation with Mr. Ducker. During your consultation, you can discuss your
specific divorce concerns with him and have all your questions answered so you
can move forward with your divorce as an informed participant.
It Could be Better for your Divorce
Whether
collaborative divorce or mediation is better does not just depend on your
personalities. Your level of knowledge about the divorce process can also
determine whether you are better suited for one or the other. A mediator can
explain each part of your settlement and how agreements are reached. He or she
is a guide to divorce, whereas with a collaborative divorce, you and your
spouse guide yourselves. Of course, you have a divorce lawyer no matter which
type of divorce you choose, and your lawyer can answer any questions you have
and provide you with the advice you need. But a mediator is an additional layer
of professional advice and guidance, guidance that is meant to empower you and
your spouse to make productive, fair choices about your divorce settlement.
Monday, June 26, 2017
How to tell if your Divorce is affecting your Children, and How to Help!
A divorce can be difficult
on every member of a family. Children, even very young children, are perceptive
to their parents’ conflicts and can feel stressed about the changes to their lives
that come with a divorce. The reality of potentially having to move, no longer
seeing each parent every day, possibly meeting their parents’ new partners, and
adjusting to a different routine can have a significant impact on a child’s
mental and physical health. If you are a parent going through a divorce, you
can take steps to reduce your child’s stress levels.
Look for Warning Signs
A few warning
signs that a child is in mental distress about his or her parents’ divorce
include:
● Poor performance on schoolwork;
● Changed personality;
● Withdrawal from social activities;
● Changed eating or sleeping habits;
● Reduced self esteem; and
● An unwillingness to discuss the divorce or his or her feelings about it.
Know How Divorce Tends to Affect your Child’s Age
Group and Gender
Although there
are many other variables that can impact how a child is affected by his or her
parents’ divorce, the child’s age and gender can help parents predict and
recognize the mental health difficulties he or she faces. Boys tend to become
angry and aggressive and often show this by fighting and acting out in school. Girls
are more likely to become withdrawn and depressed.
Preschoolers and
school age children can suffer most from feeling like they have no control in a
divorce. Teenagers can feel betrayed and may become angry and attempt to be
more independent.
● Poor performance on schoolwork;
● Changed personality;
● Withdrawal from social activities;
● Changed eating or sleeping habits;
● Reduced self esteem; and
● An unwillingness to discuss the divorce or his or her feelings about it.
Encourage your
child to communicate with you about the divorce. If your child has questions,
answer them in an age-appropriate manner that provides enough information to
satisfy the question without overwhelming your child. Keep these discussions
positive – do not make negative comments about the divorce or your former
partner, no matter how you feel about them.
Help your Child Receive Help if Necessary
If you observe
one or more of the symptoms discussed above in your child, your child’s
pediatrician can refer him or her to a child psychologist or licensed
counselor. Consider working with a counselor who specifically handles
divorce-related issues in children. Your child’s school psychologist or
guidance counselor can also be a helpful resource for him or her. You, too, can
help your child during and after your divorce. Maintain structure in your
household, such as daily and weekly routines and a set of rules and
expectations. This can help your child feel secure and eliminate feelings of
confusion and anxiety.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park Divorce
Attorney
As a parent, it
can be difficult to know the right thing to do for your child when you are
going through a divorce. Understand that you are not alone and when you need
help for your child or yourself, your divorce
lawyer can point you in the right direction to
get that help. Contact The Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C. in
Winter Park today to set up your initial consultation in our office.
Wednesday, May 17, 2017
How Can I Prepare for my Collaborative Divorce?
If you and your spouse can work amicably together to discuss the terms of your divorce settlement, you could be candidates for a collaborative divorce. In a collaborative divorce, the couple and their individual lawyers work together to create a divorce settlement without involving the court. Generally, this makes the divorce process easier, less expensive, and less time-consuming for all parties involved.
Before your first meeting with a collaborative divorce lawyer, work with your spouse to prepare for the process. Below are a few ways you can prepare yourselves for your collaborative divorce to make the process as simple and straightforward as possible.
Identify your Goals
You might not have thought much about your goals for the divorce other than wanting to end your marriage. Take time to reflect on what you want from the divorce, such as a specific share of your marital assets. By identifying your goals before you start negotiations, you will be better equipped to advocate for them.
Discuss your Goals with your Spouse
Communicate with your spouse about your goals for the divorce. You might feel strongly about remaining in your marital home and he or she might feel strongly about retaining other assets. Identify the issues each feels most strongly about and where you are willing to compromise to allow both parties to reach their goals.
Have All your Updated Documents Ready
These documents include the title to your home, statements for bank and investment accounts, documentation of your current assets and income, and an itemized list of all your debts. You will need these documents to fairly divide your assets in your divorce.
Understand the Collaborative Divorce Process
Although you and your spouse will work together in your collaborative divorce, you will need to each retain your own lawyer. This is because despite working toward similar goals, you each have unique needs and you both have rights as individuals.
Your lawyer’s role is to be your advocate through this process and ensure that your rights are not violated. He or she can also help you understand the legal jargon you encounter during the divorce process and explain the pros and cons of potential choices you and your spouse make about your divorce settlement. Your lawyer may also draw upon his or her professional network to bring in outside parties to aid in your divorce, such as a real estate appraiser to value your home in order to divide its value equitably.
Working with a lawyer can also ensure that your paperwork is properly notarized and filed with the court.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park Divorce Lawyer
A collaborative divorce can be a liberating experience for a divorcing couple. If you and your spouse determine that collaboration is the way to go with your divorce, contact an experienced Winter Park collaborative divorce lawyer to move forward with the process. Contact The Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C. today to schedule your initial consultation with our firm.
Resource:
money.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/articles/2013/08/19/why-a-collaborative-divorce-makes-financial-sense
Monday, May 15, 2017
Dividing your Home in your Divorce
In most divorce cases, the couple’s home is their largest asset. Dividing a home in a divorce can be a contentious process, not only because of the monetary value of the home but because of the emotional value it has to the couple and their children. There are a few different strategies divorcing couples use to divide their homes. The right strategy for you and your spouse depends on your current circumstances and future goals. Talk with your lawyer about the strategies discussed below to determine which is best for your case.
Sell the House and Split the Profits
For many divorcing couples, selling the marital home and splitting the profit from the sale is the most efficient way to divide the home. This often requires the couple to work with a real estate appraiser, who determines the market value of the home so they can better factor it into their property division settlement. In many cases, the couple splits the profit from the sale evenly. However, this is not a requirement.
One Spouse Buys Out the Other’s Interest in the Home
If one spouse wants to stay in the home and can afford to pay the remainder of its mortgage, he or she may opt to “buy out” the other party’s interest in the home. In this scenario, a real estate appraiser may need to determine the home’s market value, which is then used alongside the couple’s equity in the home to determine each party’s interest in the home. As with cases where the couple sells their home, the court may determine that the parties are not entitled to equal shares of the home’s value and work a fair breakdown of this value into the couple’s property division settlement. In a case like this, the spouse who keeps the home must refinance the home’s mortgage in his or her own name.
Combining these Strategies and Considering Others
You might also consider having one partner remain in the home until your children are grown, then selling it and sharing the profits. This could involve working out a deal that allows the partner who leaves the home to take certain other assets to make up for the other’s benefit of keeping the house for a longer period of time.
Some couples choose another way to divide their home after their divorce: retaining ownership of it and alternating weeks in the house with the children. This is known as birdnesting. For some couples, this is a way to save money.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park Divorce Lawyer
Choosing the right divorce lawyer to handle your case is one of the most important choices you will make during the divorce process. To set up your initial consultation with experienced Winter Park divorce lawyer Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., contact The Law Offices of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C. today. During your consultation, you can discuss your goals for your divorce and develop strategies to promote them while protecting your rights.
Resources:
psychologytoday.com/blog/co-parenting-after-divorce/201307/birds-nest-co-parenting-arrangements
bankrate.com/finance/mortgages/breaking-mortgage-divorce-1.aspx
Wednesday, March 22, 2017
I Am a Grandparent. What are my Rights to my Grandchildren?
As a grandparent,
you probably cherish the relationships you have with your grandchildren. When
an issue like your child’s divorce, death, or court involvement with your
grandchildren’s lives threatens to sever this bond, it is important that you
understand your rights as a grandparent and how to legally exercise them. Many people do
not realize that grandparents do have rights to their grandchildren, such as
the right to visitation with them and the right to adopt them in the event
their parents’ rights are terminated. These rights also apply to
great-grandparents.
Your Visitation Rights Depend on your
Grandchildren’s Circumstances
Currently, a
grandparent can petition for visitation with his or her grandchild if the
following circumstances apply:
● Both of the child’s parents are missing,
deceased, or in a vegetative state; or
● One of the child’s parents is missing, deceased,
or in a vegetative state and the child’s other parent has been convicted of a
felony or a violent offense that poses a threat to the child’s safety or well
being.
If neither of the
above circumstances apply, you cannot petition for visitation rights with your
grandchild. If one of the above circumstances applies, you do not automatically
have visitation or custody of your grandchild. You must first attend a hearing
to determine whether the child’s parent or parents are unfit. If this is
determined, a second hearing is scheduled to determine whether visitation is in
the child’s best interest. Numerous factors are considered when making this determination,
including whether visitation between the child and his or her grandparent would
harm the child’s relationship with his or her parents.
Advocating for yourself and your Rights
Your lawyer can
help you initially determine if you have grounds to petition for visitation
rights with your grandchild and if you do choose to file one, he or she can
help you demonstrate to the court why such an arrangement is in your
grandchild’s best interest. Your strategy may involve showing the court how a
disruption to your current relationship with your grandchild would cause him or
her to suffer emotional or physical harm, that you are in good health and that
you are physically capable of caring for a child, the relationship you
currently have with your grandchild and its support by your grandchild’s
parent, and/or whether you had an established relationship with your grandchild
prior to filing a petition for visitation rights to him or her.
Work with an Experienced Winter Park
Grandparents’ Rights Lawyer
As a grandparent
in Florida, you have certain rights to your grandchildren. If you feel you are
being unfairly shut out of your grandchildren’s lives, consider taking legal
action to assert your rights to visitation with them. Contact The Law Offices
of Aubrey Harry Ducker, Jr., P.L.C. today to set up your initial consultation
with an experienced Florida grandparents’ rights lawyer.
During your consultation, we will examine the unique circumstances you are
facing and help you determine the right legal strategy for asserting your
rights.
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