Helping Senior Adults, Elder Law 101

People ask me, "What is Elder Law?"

I answer, it is helping older Americans with problems that come up primarily due to age. You realize of course that after a certain number of years, thoughts of death become more prevalent and preparation becomes much more important. Children become adults and begin asking, "What do I do about my parents?" When parents begin needing assistance, adult children bear a great burden. They may have children of their own in school or starting out and suddenly, Mom needs a new place to live that will provide nursing care. These problems are not new; our processes of dealing with care of the elderly is not new. All over the globe, seniors are afforded great respect and care. Only in the United States do we warehouse seniors in "adult communities," Assisted Living Facilities and Nursing homes.

When Daddy needs nursing care, what questions should be answered?
First: How much care is needed?
Second: How much care can he afford?
Third: Who is responsible to pay when Daddy cannot?

Other questions that may come up include:

What about Social Security, and Medicare?
Do we need to do "Medicaid Planning?"
What is Medicaid Planning?

Parents may not wish to discuss their finances with adult children and may feel freer to discuss the details of planning with an Elder Law Professional. Many times parents have begun the process, but children are kept in the dark for fear that the children will want to "inherit" early. Many seniors have received advice regarding Medicaid Planning over the radio or television but may not understand fully the details. Many seniors worry about losing their homestead or the equity they have built up over the years. In Florida, we protect homesteads. The equity in the home can survive incapacity and death provided simple steps are taken to preserve all the rights afforded to homeowners.

When Medicaid begins to enter the conversation  with regard to health care, it may be too late. Most Health care Decisions must be made quickly; however, medicaid planning may require as much as 5 years to be fully effective.

When you are faced with these and other questions, Call me at 407-645-3297, or visit my website at www.aubreylaw.com

What do You do when You don't Know What to do?

When all around you are losing their heads over some perceived emergency without any plan of action, What do You Do? Do you stop and ask directions? Do you sit quietly and wait for the storm to pass, then clean up the mess and plan better to prevent future emergencies? Do you lead the charge, yelling do something to those around you who neither know what needs to be done nor how to go about doing it?
I am one who addresses those emergencies in life with a calm reflection. I have seen the damage done by a hasty response. I have witnessed the exponential increase in stress caused by the "Chicken Little" response of "the sky is falling".
Many years ago, I was the one to notice the sky falling and attempt to warn those around me. Working on the electrical plant of a Nuclear Submarine, I would many times see an emergency arrise on the meters and guages and it was my duty to not only note the changes, but to recommend actions to prevent damage to crucial equipment. Others might jump in before seeing All the indicators, trying to fix the first indications only to compound the real source of the problem. Many times, waiting for the opportune moment to suggest a better course of action means being heard rather than ignored.
In my practice, I see people in some of their worst situations, impending death, Family strife, marital strife, Divorce, etc. Many times alcoholism or drug addiction play a part in destroyed relationships. Other times, simple communication issues cause complete distrust or misunderstanding. An outsider who has witnessed the progression of strife, can see the direction, even if he or she cannot adequately communicate to the parties involved.
Life can be like that. Make a friendly suggestion before the friend recognizes the dire straits, and risk being ignored. Once the magnitude of problem is considered, a timely suggestion means all the difference in the world. Call me at 407-645-3297 or visit my website at www.aubreylaw.com and let me help you recognize the symptoms and solutions to your problems.

Making Sound Decisions

Most people assume that given all relevant information, they will make sound decisions. Many people however, do not know when they have all the relevant information and may consider much irrelevant information in their decision making process.
When considering a contract, You Need An Attorney.
Contracts take many forms and all are considered by the courts to be a law between the parties. Whether the contract is for a Water Purification System in your home, a Home Security Monitoring Agreement, a Child Support or Alimony Agreement, an Insurance Settlement, a Probate Accounting, an agreement for piano lessons, a Timeshare Purchase, a Lease, or the purchase of an appliance with a warranty, You Need An Attorney. The company presenting the contract for your signature no doubt had an attorney look at the document to determine its legality and enforceability. You should also have an attorney review the contract. Most Insurance companies have staffs of attorneys to draft and review settlement agreements. The agreements are presented to the consumer by "Adjusters" who work for the insurance company. You the consumer need an attorney as well.

Speaking engagement on Saturday

My wife will be speaking at the second anniversary of the Professional Men's Christian Fellowship Meeting at Baldwin Park on Saturday, June 13th at 6:30 PM. Having worked with her on the outline for her topic, Spiritual Empowerment During Economic Slowdown or Financial Issues During Recession, I wanted to share some excerpts here.

Personal Skills related to Financial Management

a. Earning potential
i. Education
ii. Training
iii. Ability
iv. Societal Need

b. Personal Management potential
i. Budgeting
ii. Time – everybody gets the same 24 hours per day
iii. Talents – Know which talents serve you best
iv. Treasures – Money Management – Cash Flow
v. Keeping up with the Neighbors – Things – Needs v. Wants

Source of Financial Crisis

A. Spending more than we earn

1. Knowing what we earn
a. Gross Pay – Wages Tips and other Compensation
b. Federal Tax Withheld
c. Social Security Tax Withheld
d. Medicare Tax Withheld
e. Health Insurance Paid by Employer
f. 401K or other Retirement Contributions
g. All other deductions (Union Dues)
h. Net Pay

2. Knowing what we spend
a. Fill up the gas tank
b. Lunch out
c. Dinner out with the family
d. Trip to the Grocery Store
e. “Unexpected Expenditures”
New Tires, brakes, car repairs not covered by the warranty
Medical co-pays
Emergencies

3. Spending Wisely - Budgeting

When Its Over

How do you know when the marriage is truly OVER?

A Few Questions:
Has counseling been attempted, in good faith by both parties?
Has the "objectional conduct" (whether that be financial irresponsibility, adultery, abuse or disrespect) continued despite numerous suggestions, demands, ultimatums, counseling sessions and threats?
Have you put forth every effort to follow the Serenity Prayer?

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

Are there things you cannot change that your partner cannot forgive?
Are there things your partner cannot change that you cannot forgive?

If you answer yes to these questions, then it is time for a divorce. Children do not flourish in an environment of discord, anger, mistrust and false security. If you would get divorced but for having children, how does your conflict affect the children?

Most people who call my office either Know their marriage is over, or Want to Know if their marriage can be saved. Unfortunately, Whether their marriage is over or salvageable is one question they have to answer for themselves. If you are looking here for the answer, call me and lets discuss the situation. I'll try to help You find the right answer for You.