1629 Miles for Thanksgiving

This year for Thanksgiving, we drove to Signal Mountain, just outside Chattanooga, Tennessee, to spend the holiday with my family. My parents still live on a farm there and my brother and his wife had their second child, a boy, the Thursday before Thanksgiving. I planned to cook the traditional Turkey, dressing and cranberry salad at my mother's then take dinner to my brother and his family in the valley.

Just before we left for the trip, my wife learned of her college roommate's mother's passing in Greenville, Tennessee, about 3 1/2 hours north of Chattanooga. Since we were also planning to drive to Durham, NC for the Duke v. Miami game, we made the detour for the funeral. This meant Four days of driving over a 6 day holiday weekend. We left Florida Tuesday evening and made it almost to Macon, Ga., before spending the night. Waking up in Cordell, we drove most of the morning to reach Tennessee; however, just before leaving Georgia, we stopped for lunch at my sister's house for lunch with her and her 3 wonderful children. Later that afternoon, we finally arrived at my Grandfather's farm on Signal Mountain. The evening centered on making the oyster dressing and cranberry salad with groceries brought from Florida.

Thanksgiving Day, I spent most of the morning walking around the farm after putting the turkey in the oven to roast. Mom, Dad and I surveyed the back fence lines and tried to find one corner so we could put the final fence up between my mom's property and that sold to a new owner. After we ate lunch, my brother finally arrived with his 2 year old son, so Andy and I walked the fence lines again to verify proper markings corresponded to the deeds issued by the probate court. After it got dark, Andy took dinner home to his wife and baby, and we planned to follow to get a look at the newest Ducker. Unfortunately, as we went to get in the car, I realized I did not have my keys. Fearing I had dropped them somewhere over the miles of fence line I had traversed today, all woodsy and briar filled, I was rather apoplectic. Thankfully my wife found the keys right where I had dropped them in our room.

On Friday morning, we left about sunup to drive to Greeneville for the funeral. My wife's college roommate's mother had been living in Greeneville, Tennessee, to be near one daughter who could take care of her to prevent having to go to an assisted living facility or nursing home. Ironically, the funeral occurred at Tusculum Baptist Church, across the street from Tusculum College, one of the schools my 17-year old is considering. We drove around before the funeral taking in the beautiful campus and sports facilities.

I'll have to write more tomorrow! If you need assistance in selecting an attorney in the Central Florida area for a Collaborative Divorce, Elder Law, Family Law, Guardianship or other question, please call me at 407-645-3297 or visit my website at www.aubreylaw.com

Thanks, Aubrey

Welcome Back

Recently someone said, "Aubrey Ducker, why haven't you updated your blog in a while?"

She continued, "I was looking forward to your answer to a Family Law Question! What happens when a child decides she wants to go live with her father? I have been taking care of her for the past 8 years, without any help! Now that she is 12, her father is encouraging her to stay at his house more and more. He gives her everything she wants and I'm the one who has to make her do homework, study for tests, clean her room, etc. . . "

You can see where that is going! If only children would remain under our control and direction! Unfortunately, they decide right or wrong that they want to decide what is "best for them" rather than listening to some old people who didn't even have facebook when they were young. Have you been through this? I have! With my own children and with many, many clients!

It is never fun to lose control!

Then there are the Elder Law questions: How can I make sure my children don't argue about who gets what? That question is so much better than the corallary promise, "My children won't argue about it. They would never go to court to challenge ___________________as the Personal Representative."

Funny how many times I hear that and how many times I see adult children wanting nothing more than to "tell it to the Judge" regarding the actions of their sibling as Power of Attorney or Personal Representative.

Talk about losing control.

You may have read in the papers, (do you actually read the Newspaper anymore?) the Florida Legislature is trying to balance the budget by cutting into court funding. Removing funding for the Guardian Ad Litem program and other "services" that to legislators seem "unnecessary" is no way to protect the bottom line in Florida. The services being cut may save a few dollars this year, but in the years to come, those savings will be offset by enormous costs associated with unmet needs in disfunctional families. The results may be increased incidence of domestic violence, child abuse, neglect or more violent crimes.

Please encourage your representatives to look to fair funding principles. When corporations like GE have NET profits in the range of $14.7 Billion, and pay less than 1 million in taxes, something in the tax structure is way out of whack. Cutting spending to make the budget work, while corporations pay next to nothing in taxes harms all citizens, especially the most vulnerable. Maybe I should write more often so I could break this up into several Blog posts. I'll try that next time.

Peace.

Transferring Real Property outside of Probate

Many people want to know, How do I leave my legacy to my children without their having to go through the hassle of Probate. Sometimes the fear of probate is unwarranted. Many times the fear of costs for probate prevent people taking the simple step of calling an attorney to inquire. Remember, if you never ask a question, the answer always remains, "NO".

Probate costs are monitored byt he court, with Judges signing off on most fee applications. Many times an attorney will agree to a lesser rate if he or she has represented you or the decedent in the past.

Sometimes however, an attorney may be able to suggest ways to avoid probate altogether. Instruments such as "Life Estate Deeds" and Lady Bird Deeds may be very useful in allowing a senior to maintain control of their property right up until death, then avoid probate by having it transferred through the prior filed deed. Many times you just have to know what questions to ask.